When I am older am I going to drink soda out of a can with a straw like my grandmother?

Well, am I?

Today I have just been peeing like a broken person. I figure that if I drink a lot of fluids all the crap I ate today will flush out of my system before all the calories have the chance to absorb into my body and turn into fat pockets which I will have to work off... but who has the time? I spend most of my day slouching in a chair and crossing my legs. This equals: fat butt and scoliosis or something. I realized that Chipotle is a flippin liar is what it is... so at the 'restaurant' there is a calorie count next to each item... my item's estimate was like 400 more or less... uh, no. I went on the Chipotle website to use the calorie calculator just because I was curious and did not want to do my work. Surprise. No... the total calories was 900. Eek. So... I am peeing it out like a champ. I don't really think it works this way. I am in it for the placebo effect... no I really don't think it works this way either... I don't know.